DOOOONE!!!

Holy Cow..
DONE!
I am officially DONE with school!! I finished my extern on the 4th and man.. what a weird feeling to really have nothing to do and no where to go! Hopefully not for long tho, on the job hunt I go!
In great news.. We are going to Colorado in a little over a week!! I can't believe it!! It's finally here! Almost a year since I've seen everyone and Chris hasn't been there since we left! Oh my gosh, can you tell I'm excited?? We've got a packed week and I can't wait to see everyone!
Once I get back it's on to the job hunt! I wasn't hired at my extern site, despite the fact they really wanted to.. :( They just don't have any open positions and no funding to make one.. (they are a non-profit, medicaid only office funded by grants and fundraisers, hence.. no extra funds for another assistant) I am a little sad about that, having become familiar with the office and the people and the dentists. Needless to say I'm a little nervous about looking for another position. I've decided dentists are truly some of the most picky, finicky people. They all do things differently and it takes time to really get to know how each individual does it! I'm also nervous to get out there and really be on my own. I hope I'm able to have a week or so of training before they give me my own "column" of patients. Either way, I'm going to try and not stress about it and know that God is in control over all and has something out there for me and I just need to "suck it up buttercup" as Ms. Lisa would say, lol!!
Our Thanksgiving and Christmas were wonderful! Aside from not having any time with my folks to celebrate the holidays, it was perfect! We partied at the Christensens for a few days over Christmas and it was a blast! Mom C. always plans the best little games for us. It's such a good time! Chris loved all the presents I got him, hurray! Aside from some drama with an online order everything was awesome. Soo much better than last year when all I got him either didn't fit or they shipped the wrong thing to me, etc. So yeah, awesome Christmas! Had some friends down for New Years and that was fun, stayed up far too late and I'm still kind of recovering from all those late nights.. Does that make me old??? Gah!
Super excited for Colorado!!! Only one more week!
Love,
Beth

Winter 2010

Hello all!!
Been a while since my last update, thought I would let you know how my extern was going!! I am down to 42 hours over the next three weeks, shouldn't be too bad! It's going really good, really enjoying it! The only downside of this whole thing is that my office won't be able to hire me. I'm really bummed about it! They have told me multiple times now that they would love to hire me but unfortunately with them being a non-profit, medicaid only office, they don't have the funds to hire another assistant. :( Kinda sucks.. Oh well, I know there is an office out there for me where I will fit in perfectly and is the right place for me! Just have to trust God and wait on Him! Looking forward to the next couple weeks, they are going to fly by!
The holidays have been wonderful so far! Had a great Thanksgiving with family and friends. Chris was gone for what turned into a month in Kansas and that was hard, he actually got home just a week and a half or so ago. So nice to have him home again! That made the holiday season come up very quickly! We didn't actually get our tree till last week which was weird for me since I'm used to the day after Thanksgiving! I love Christmas! Our house is all decorated and now with our tree up it just glows.. Looove! Finally got my Christmas shopping done, I've decided I'm never going to wait that long again, the pickings were slim! I am pretty pleased with what I got for Chris! Unfortunately, I'm waiting on some things to get here, hopefully in time!! They kinda screwed it up in shipping and it may take a bit to get here, which stinks, I wanted to give it to him for Christmas!! Oh well, here's hoping!
We're also planning a trip to see my folks!! Hoping for mid January!! So not much longer, woohoo!!
So there it is, a little update! Merry Christmas!!
Beth

A break, finally!

Wow, done with the class part of school! It's so weird, honestly. I can't believe it's over and the dreaded extern is almost here! I'm getting excited tho, hurray! As of now, still don't know where I'm going. Pretty frustrated with my school right now... I feel like they didn't try real hard to make sure I had a place when I was supposed to! So yeah, I should find out sometime this week and it couldn't come sooner. I am dying to know and would love to be able to plan! So this week is all about relaxing and preparing! I have a whoole week of nothing and it's wonderful! The only sad thing is Chris is gone for the next 7-10 days in KS working! I'm so sad. :( Thankfully I have a wonderful second family to stay with! My in-laws rock!
Here are the last few days of my days of truth.. I'm ahead by one day but didn't feel like adding on to it later.. haha!
Day 23: Something you wish you had done in your life? Traveled more! I loooove old places/history and would love to travel all over the world!

Day 24: Make a playlist to someone, and explain why you chose all the songs.. I would make a playlist to Chris of all our songs that mean something to me, or remind me of the times we spent together! I don't feel like writing all the songs out.. sorry!

Day 25: The reason you believe you’re still alive today? I don't know!

Day 26: Have you ever thought about giving up on life? If so, when and why? lol, no not really. I've had it pretty easy all my life and the only times I have ever felt depressed I realized I was being super self-centered and lame. Life is what you make it!

Day 27: What’s the best thing going for you right now? I'm done with school and moving on in my career! It's exciting! I have an amazing husband and life is good!

Day 28: What if you were pregnant or got someone pregnant, what would you do? CRY. From sheer terror..

Day 29: Something you hope to change about yourself. And why. Weelll.... I would change my self control! I wish I had more of it!!

Day 30: A letter to yourself: tell yourself EVERYTHING you love about yourself.
I don't feel like doing this one to be honest. Sorry! And this IS all about the truth right? ha!

Well, hopefully I will know about my externship tomorrow!

~Beth

Two days folks!

Two days!! Oh my goodness!!!
Unbelievable! It's almost here woohoo! Thank God the nerves have subsided a bit, my stomach doesn't hurt every day like it was lol! I'm starting to get kinda excited actually.. I'm sure I'll be freaking out my first day tho haha!
Here are the last couple days I missed:

Day 16: Someone or something you definitely could live without? People that bring me down! I want to surround myself with encouraging friends and my wonderful family!

Day 17: A book you’ve read that changed your views on something? The Bible obviously! Other than that, I have really enjoyed the Bodie Thoene books on times during the bible, it really made me view Jesus as more of a person that you could connect with and bond with.

Day 18: Your views on gay marriage? No.. I believe you should love everyone, that no sin is worse than another, but I don't believe it's right.

Day 19: What do you think of religion? Or what do you think of politics? I'm a Christian and believe Jesus is the son of God and my Saviour!! And a steadfast Republican even when I hate politicians..

Day 20: Your views on drugs and alcohol? I used to believe neither of both. Still believe that drugs are never a good idea to get into, not only because of the havoc it has on your body, but how uncontrollable they are. You cannot do drugs in moderation. Alchohol in moderation I think is ok. I'll indulge in a drink, I won't ever go out and get wasted tho.

Day 21: (scenario) Your best friend is in a car accident and you two got into a fight an hour before. What do you do? If she is ok, I'll be there, making it up to her and helping her realize that it was just a fight, that I love her and she means so much to me!!

Day 22: Something you wish you hadn’t done in your life? Wasted so much time doing NOTHING when I was younger... :( And I wish I would have been ok with Chris being a police officer while we lived in Colorado.. Maybe then we would have never moved.. I kick myself over that all the time..

Well, Chris will be gone for a few days in KS working. I'm kinda sad. I finally get time off of both work AND school, which hasn't happened in 7 months.. And he's gone the week I have off.. Oh well, I'm going to make the best of it and spend it with my wonderful in-laws! It will be nice and relaxing, which I def. need after the craziness of the last month!! I'll see him this weekend, so that will break it up a bit, thankfully!
Well, I'll be updated soon after I find out where I'm externing!!

Love,
~ME

One more week..

Wow, time is flying and I'm getting behind!! Here are the last TEN days of truth! Goodness!

Day 6: Something you hope you never have to do: As morbid as this sounds, I hope I die before Chris does in this life. I never want to be without him.

Day 7: Someone who has made your life worth living for: Jesus, Chris and my mom. I know that's three people, but they have been so instrumental in my life and are my rocks.

Day 8: Someone who made your life hell, or treated you like crap: Honestly, I won't name names but you remember what was it, day 5 or something? The two girls? Yeah, those two..

Day 9: Someone you didn’t want to let go, but just drifted: I feel like my Colorado people are drifting.. It's been almost a year since I've seen everyone. My family, my best friend and like it or not, being 800 miles away just sucks..

Day 10: Someone you need to let go, or wish you didn’t know: Honestly I feel like right now I'm surrounded by good people in my life! I'm blessed!

Day 11: Something people seem to compliment you the most on: it's either: you have a booty! Or, I wish I had your butt.. Sometimes just a statement or yeah.. not sure if it's a compliment! I've also had compliments on my smile..

Day 12: Something you never get compliments on: I like my eyes, but no one else seems to notice.. haha!! Chris does, that's all that matters right?

Day 13: A band or artist that has gotten you through some tough days: Hm.. Not sure actually. I remember a lot of breaking benjamin when me and Chris were long distance, it was melancholy and nice.

Day 14: A hero that has let you down: Jesus is my hero and He doesn't let me down..

Day 15: Something or someone you couldn’t live without, because you’ve tried living without it: Like I said, I would not and would never want to live without my Chris. Long distance SUCKED and the idea of not having him in my life is awful.

Well, only about a week left. Nerves are setting in.
Beth

Day 2, 3 and 4

So in continuing my 30 days of truth... Missed a few days, it's been going really fast and furious so time just slips out of my hands! So here are a few days combined..
Day 2: Something you love about yourself.
Day 3: Something you have to forgive yourself for.
Day 4: Something you have to forgive someone for.

Something you love about yourself:
I love that if I put my mind to something, I can accomplish it. I feel empowered by self motivation and like I can do anything if I want it bad enough! I don't always want it bad enough which may be my problem haha!

Something you have to forgive yourself for:
Hm. This might sound funny... But I need to forgive myself for not doing anything with my life before meeting Chris. I feel like I let too much time slip away when I could have been going to school or traveling or missions or something. I think I let fear hold me back and so I never pursued my dreams or really much of anything other than working dead end jobs. In no way do I regret my time with Chris, or how young I was when we started dating, I'm talking about before then and also while we were dating and before we got married.. I could have done a lot more..

Something you have to forgive someone for:
Wow.. I had a horrible experience with a couple of so called friends who did a lot of backstabbing.. I still feel hurt and anger about that and I know I need to get over it. Kind of hard sometimes when I still "see" them on FB or something and they are best friends now and I was kicked to the curb after introducing them.. It's hard. IT'S ALSO VERY LAME that I'm still upset about it.. It was like a 1-2 year long thing that just dragged out which is maybe why I'm still hurt. I don't know if the hurt will ever go away, but I need to get rid of the bitterness since it's only hurting myself.

Anyways, I gotta run, school today! Then the weekend, woohoo!
Beth

30 days of truth

So I found this on a friends blog and decided to do it. 30 days I'll answer 30 questions about myself. May not be able to blog every day, but I will answer all those questions haha! Here they are if you are interested in doing it yourself!

Day 1: Something you hate about yourself.
Day 2: Something you love about yourself.
Day 3: Something you have to forgive yourself for.
Day 4: Something you have to forgive someone for.
Day 5: Something you hope to do in your life.
Day 6: Something you hope you never have to do.
Day 7: Someone who has made your life worth living for.
Day 8: Someone who made your life hell, or treated you like crap.
Day 9: Someone you didn’t want to let go, but just drifted.
Day 10: Someone you need to let go, or wish you didn’t know.
Day 11: Something people seem to compliment you the most on.
Day 12: Something you never get compliments on.
Day 13: A band or artist that has gotten you through some tough ass days. (write a letter.)
Day 14: A hero that has let you down. (letter)
Day 15: Something or someone you couldn’t live without, because you’ve tried living without it.
Day 16: Someone or something you definitely could live without.
Day 17: A book you’ve read that changed your views on something.
Day 18: Your views on gay marriage.
Day 19: What do you think of religion? Or what do you think of politics?
Day 20: Your views on drugs and alcohol.
Day 21: (scenario) Your best friend is in a car accident and you two got into a fight an hour before. What do you do?
Day 22: Something you wish you hadn’t done in your life.
Day 23: Something you wish you had done in your life.
Day 24: Make a playlist to someone, and explain why you chose all the songs. (Just post the titles and artists and letter)
Day 25: The reason you believe you’re still alive today.
Day 26: Have you ever thought about giving up on life? If so, when and why?
Day 27: What’s the best thing going for you right now?
Day 28: What if you were pregnant or got someone pregnant, what would you do?
Day 29: Something you hope to change about yourself. And why.
Day 30: A letter to yourself: tell yourself EVERYTHING you love about yourself.

Ok so day one..
What is something I hate about myself..
I hate how critical I am of myself. There is really soo much I could put here, and that just goes to show you how critical I am of myself! I don't give myself a break, I'm incredibly hard on myself telling myself that I'm not good enough, pretty enough, smart enough, funny enough, etc. I have to stop myself mid-sentence sometimes and force those thoughts away because I know they are damaging to me! God made me exactly how He wanted me and I'm flawless in His eyes. I know that every time I comment on something in my head that puts me down, HE hurts, because I'm beating up His design! That is what I hate about myself.. But I'm working on it... And all the other things too..

So in the life of Beth..
Not much new really. Only about 3 weeks left of school. Psyching out now.. Have to tell myself to breath, and NOT beat myself up haha! I'm already pep-talking myself in case I go somewhere awful. I'm going to be upbeat! AND SUCK UP! haha! No really, I'm already planning on doing my best, learning something every day, working on what I need to get better at, and not letting people bring me down. Only 160 hours and hopefully they are a wonderful 160 hours!
Hard to believe it's almost here.. Seems like yesterday I started and was all nervous about school! And they are like family now, made some friends and it's been so wonderful going with Jenny and getting to know her better. I'm so blessed to have such a wonderful sister in law who I can really talk to and freak out with and be excited with!! What a blessing God has given me in her!! Love you Jenny! ;) It's so awesome to truly love my extended family, all of them! I get along great with all my sister in laws and mother in law and of course all the boys haha! So lucky!!
God is good.. All the time.. Have to keep telling myself when the going gets tough. He is our provider and what a good one He is!

Much love,
Beth

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