Sigh..

I'm so frustrated. I just need a little vent and a little motivation. I would think I have enough motivation, I'm sick and tired of certain things in my life and yet I won't make the effort to change them. I mean honestly..
There are so many things I want but they take time and I seem to be incapable of achieving them! I've not only been frustrated with that but stressed with the whole school thing. I hate that it is so much to go and that is the only thing holding me back. And what if I don't like it?? I'll have spent so much to go through school only to not like what I do for the rest of my career?? I am just confused. I want to KNOW what I'm supposed to do. I want to be told, to be honest. I hate having to choose for myself lol. I'm bad at being an adult haha! So I have been feeling so stressed. I can't get it out of my mind and I can't seem to make UP my mind! I just need to give it over to Jesus and wait on Him. I just want a clearcut decision. Maybe that's too much to ask. I don't know.
I hate feeling down. I just want to have it figured out and to do what I'm supposed to!
This is my decleration: I CAN do this. I CAN be an adult and I will figure this out and do what I need to do to make my life better.
Here is my to do list for the next month:
1. Run three miles. And also, run three times a week.
2. Finish my Jillian Michaels diet with a BANG and to stick to it for the whole 30 days!
3. Decide on/start school or get a job before then.
4. TRUST GOD.
5. Start church hunting more seriously.
6. Work harder on my photography.
7. Be a better wife to my sweetest husband.

Oh in other news besides all that depressing stuff.. (sorry about that btw, it just helps me feel better to get it off my chest)..
I FRIED yesterday! Went walking/running with Jenny and our dogs yesterday and oh my gosh I am red like a lobster! Wow it hurts. And not only after that, I decided to make mashed potatoes for dinner and proceeded to chop part of my finger off with a potato peeler! lol! Ok not funny it looks so horrible, but the story with it does sound pretty funny. Dancing around my kitchen, wrapping toilet paper and electrical tape around my hand (don't laugh, I was trying to make a big bandaid... Didn't work) and calling both of my mothers trying to find out what to do when you chop you finger up. lol! Wow.. My husband has been SO sweet to me!! He insisted on my sitting down and doing nothing while he proceeded to make dinner for us! And he was so cute bandaging my finger up. :( On top of that, he's been taking care of my sunburn too haha! I am just a mess this week! God is good tho, all the time. :D
I love:
1. The chinese restaraunt down the road from us.. YUM.
2. My wonderful hubby!!
3. Breakfast in bed..
4. Coffee
5. The way running makes me feel when I'm done.
6. Popcorn
7. The way eating healthy makes me feel.
8. My family.. And extended family. I'm so lucky.