Wow, time is flying and I'm getting behind!! Here are the last TEN days of truth! Goodness!
Day 6: Something you hope you never have to do: As morbid as this sounds, I hope I die before Chris does in this life. I never want to be without him.
Day 7: Someone who has made your life worth living for: Jesus, Chris and my mom. I know that's three people, but they have been so instrumental in my life and are my rocks.
Day 8: Someone who made your life hell, or treated you like crap: Honestly, I won't name names but you remember what was it, day 5 or something? The two girls? Yeah, those two..
Day 9: Someone you didn’t want to let go, but just drifted: I feel like my Colorado people are drifting.. It's been almost a year since I've seen everyone. My family, my best friend and like it or not, being 800 miles away just sucks..
Day 10: Someone you need to let go, or wish you didn’t know: Honestly I feel like right now I'm surrounded by good people in my life! I'm blessed!
Day 11: Something people seem to compliment you the most on: it's either: you have a booty! Or, I wish I had your butt.. Sometimes just a statement or yeah.. not sure if it's a compliment! I've also had compliments on my smile..
Day 12: Something you never get compliments on: I like my eyes, but no one else seems to notice.. haha!! Chris does, that's all that matters right?
Day 13: A band or artist that has gotten you through some tough days: Hm.. Not sure actually. I remember a lot of breaking benjamin when me and Chris were long distance, it was melancholy and nice.
Day 14: A hero that has let you down: Jesus is my hero and He doesn't let me down..
Day 15: Something or someone you couldn’t live without, because you’ve tried living without it: Like I said, I would not and would never want to live without my Chris. Long distance SUCKED and the idea of not having him in my life is awful.
Well, only about a week left. Nerves are setting in.
Beth
Tuesday, November 2, 2010
Friday, October 22, 2010
Day 2, 3 and 4
So in continuing my 30 days of truth... Missed a few days, it's been going really fast and furious so time just slips out of my hands! So here are a few days combined..
Day 2: Something you love about yourself.
Day 3: Something you have to forgive yourself for.
Day 4: Something you have to forgive someone for.
Something you love about yourself:
I love that if I put my mind to something, I can accomplish it. I feel empowered by self motivation and like I can do anything if I want it bad enough! I don't always want it bad enough which may be my problem haha!
Something you have to forgive yourself for:
Hm. This might sound funny... But I need to forgive myself for not doing anything with my life before meeting Chris. I feel like I let too much time slip away when I could have been going to school or traveling or missions or something. I think I let fear hold me back and so I never pursued my dreams or really much of anything other than working dead end jobs. In no way do I regret my time with Chris, or how young I was when we started dating, I'm talking about before then and also while we were dating and before we got married.. I could have done a lot more..
Something you have to forgive someone for:
Wow.. I had a horrible experience with a couple of so called friends who did a lot of backstabbing.. I still feel hurt and anger about that and I know I need to get over it. Kind of hard sometimes when I still "see" them on FB or something and they are best friends now and I was kicked to the curb after introducing them.. It's hard. IT'S ALSO VERY LAME that I'm still upset about it.. It was like a 1-2 year long thing that just dragged out which is maybe why I'm still hurt. I don't know if the hurt will ever go away, but I need to get rid of the bitterness since it's only hurting myself.
Anyways, I gotta run, school today! Then the weekend, woohoo!
Beth
Day 2: Something you love about yourself.
Day 3: Something you have to forgive yourself for.
Day 4: Something you have to forgive someone for.
Something you love about yourself:
I love that if I put my mind to something, I can accomplish it. I feel empowered by self motivation and like I can do anything if I want it bad enough! I don't always want it bad enough which may be my problem haha!
Something you have to forgive yourself for:
Hm. This might sound funny... But I need to forgive myself for not doing anything with my life before meeting Chris. I feel like I let too much time slip away when I could have been going to school or traveling or missions or something. I think I let fear hold me back and so I never pursued my dreams or really much of anything other than working dead end jobs. In no way do I regret my time with Chris, or how young I was when we started dating, I'm talking about before then and also while we were dating and before we got married.. I could have done a lot more..
Something you have to forgive someone for:
Wow.. I had a horrible experience with a couple of so called friends who did a lot of backstabbing.. I still feel hurt and anger about that and I know I need to get over it. Kind of hard sometimes when I still "see" them on FB or something and they are best friends now and I was kicked to the curb after introducing them.. It's hard. IT'S ALSO VERY LAME that I'm still upset about it.. It was like a 1-2 year long thing that just dragged out which is maybe why I'm still hurt. I don't know if the hurt will ever go away, but I need to get rid of the bitterness since it's only hurting myself.
Anyways, I gotta run, school today! Then the weekend, woohoo!
Beth
Tuesday, October 19, 2010
30 days of truth
So I found this on a friends blog and decided to do it. 30 days I'll answer 30 questions about myself. May not be able to blog every day, but I will answer all those questions haha! Here they are if you are interested in doing it yourself!
Day 1: Something you hate about yourself.
Day 2: Something you love about yourself.
Day 3: Something you have to forgive yourself for.
Day 4: Something you have to forgive someone for.
Day 5: Something you hope to do in your life.
Day 6: Something you hope you never have to do.
Day 7: Someone who has made your life worth living for.
Day 8: Someone who made your life hell, or treated you like crap.
Day 9: Someone you didn’t want to let go, but just drifted.
Day 10: Someone you need to let go, or wish you didn’t know.
Day 11: Something people seem to compliment you the most on.
Day 12: Something you never get compliments on.
Day 13: A band or artist that has gotten you through some tough ass days. (write a letter.)
Day 14: A hero that has let you down. (letter)
Day 15: Something or someone you couldn’t live without, because you’ve tried living without it.
Day 16: Someone or something you definitely could live without.
Day 17: A book you’ve read that changed your views on something.
Day 18: Your views on gay marriage.
Day 19: What do you think of religion? Or what do you think of politics?
Day 20: Your views on drugs and alcohol.
Day 21: (scenario) Your best friend is in a car accident and you two got into a fight an hour before. What do you do?
Day 22: Something you wish you hadn’t done in your life.
Day 23: Something you wish you had done in your life.
Day 24: Make a playlist to someone, and explain why you chose all the songs. (Just post the titles and artists and letter)
Day 25: The reason you believe you’re still alive today.
Day 26: Have you ever thought about giving up on life? If so, when and why?
Day 27: What’s the best thing going for you right now?
Day 28: What if you were pregnant or got someone pregnant, what would you do?
Day 29: Something you hope to change about yourself. And why.
Day 30: A letter to yourself: tell yourself EVERYTHING you love about yourself.
Ok so day one..
What is something I hate about myself..
I hate how critical I am of myself. There is really soo much I could put here, and that just goes to show you how critical I am of myself! I don't give myself a break, I'm incredibly hard on myself telling myself that I'm not good enough, pretty enough, smart enough, funny enough, etc. I have to stop myself mid-sentence sometimes and force those thoughts away because I know they are damaging to me! God made me exactly how He wanted me and I'm flawless in His eyes. I know that every time I comment on something in my head that puts me down, HE hurts, because I'm beating up His design! That is what I hate about myself.. But I'm working on it... And all the other things too..
So in the life of Beth..
Not much new really. Only about 3 weeks left of school. Psyching out now.. Have to tell myself to breath, and NOT beat myself up haha! I'm already pep-talking myself in case I go somewhere awful. I'm going to be upbeat! AND SUCK UP! haha! No really, I'm already planning on doing my best, learning something every day, working on what I need to get better at, and not letting people bring me down. Only 160 hours and hopefully they are a wonderful 160 hours!
Hard to believe it's almost here.. Seems like yesterday I started and was all nervous about school! And they are like family now, made some friends and it's been so wonderful going with Jenny and getting to know her better. I'm so blessed to have such a wonderful sister in law who I can really talk to and freak out with and be excited with!! What a blessing God has given me in her!! Love you Jenny! ;) It's so awesome to truly love my extended family, all of them! I get along great with all my sister in laws and mother in law and of course all the boys haha! So lucky!!
God is good.. All the time.. Have to keep telling myself when the going gets tough. He is our provider and what a good one He is!
Much love,
Beth
Day 1: Something you hate about yourself.
Day 2: Something you love about yourself.
Day 3: Something you have to forgive yourself for.
Day 4: Something you have to forgive someone for.
Day 5: Something you hope to do in your life.
Day 6: Something you hope you never have to do.
Day 7: Someone who has made your life worth living for.
Day 8: Someone who made your life hell, or treated you like crap.
Day 9: Someone you didn’t want to let go, but just drifted.
Day 10: Someone you need to let go, or wish you didn’t know.
Day 11: Something people seem to compliment you the most on.
Day 12: Something you never get compliments on.
Day 13: A band or artist that has gotten you through some tough ass days. (write a letter.)
Day 14: A hero that has let you down. (letter)
Day 15: Something or someone you couldn’t live without, because you’ve tried living without it.
Day 16: Someone or something you definitely could live without.
Day 17: A book you’ve read that changed your views on something.
Day 18: Your views on gay marriage.
Day 19: What do you think of religion? Or what do you think of politics?
Day 20: Your views on drugs and alcohol.
Day 21: (scenario) Your best friend is in a car accident and you two got into a fight an hour before. What do you do?
Day 22: Something you wish you hadn’t done in your life.
Day 23: Something you wish you had done in your life.
Day 24: Make a playlist to someone, and explain why you chose all the songs. (Just post the titles and artists and letter)
Day 25: The reason you believe you’re still alive today.
Day 26: Have you ever thought about giving up on life? If so, when and why?
Day 27: What’s the best thing going for you right now?
Day 28: What if you were pregnant or got someone pregnant, what would you do?
Day 29: Something you hope to change about yourself. And why.
Day 30: A letter to yourself: tell yourself EVERYTHING you love about yourself.
Ok so day one..
What is something I hate about myself..
I hate how critical I am of myself. There is really soo much I could put here, and that just goes to show you how critical I am of myself! I don't give myself a break, I'm incredibly hard on myself telling myself that I'm not good enough, pretty enough, smart enough, funny enough, etc. I have to stop myself mid-sentence sometimes and force those thoughts away because I know they are damaging to me! God made me exactly how He wanted me and I'm flawless in His eyes. I know that every time I comment on something in my head that puts me down, HE hurts, because I'm beating up His design! That is what I hate about myself.. But I'm working on it... And all the other things too..
So in the life of Beth..
Not much new really. Only about 3 weeks left of school. Psyching out now.. Have to tell myself to breath, and NOT beat myself up haha! I'm already pep-talking myself in case I go somewhere awful. I'm going to be upbeat! AND SUCK UP! haha! No really, I'm already planning on doing my best, learning something every day, working on what I need to get better at, and not letting people bring me down. Only 160 hours and hopefully they are a wonderful 160 hours!
Hard to believe it's almost here.. Seems like yesterday I started and was all nervous about school! And they are like family now, made some friends and it's been so wonderful going with Jenny and getting to know her better. I'm so blessed to have such a wonderful sister in law who I can really talk to and freak out with and be excited with!! What a blessing God has given me in her!! Love you Jenny! ;) It's so awesome to truly love my extended family, all of them! I get along great with all my sister in laws and mother in law and of course all the boys haha! So lucky!!
God is good.. All the time.. Have to keep telling myself when the going gets tough. He is our provider and what a good one He is!
Much love,
Beth
Thursday, September 30, 2010
Fall!
Holy cow,
It's FALL!!! Where did summer go?! Totally felt like I wasn't able to truly enjoy summer because of school.. oh well, it was worth it and hopefully next summer I'll be working and able to enjoy it even more! ha! Next year is going to be so different!
Only a month and a half left folks! 5 1/2 months went entirely too fast. Good and bad really. Can't believe it! Things are going really good still, finally feeling like I'm starting to know my stuff a bit more. Still have a looot to learn and it will be hard first starting out in a real office environment! Please be praying for me to be placed in a good office with a dentist that is patient and willing to teach me and doesn't freak out over little things. I keep hearing scary stories of other people in extern getting a scary dentist/office manager and that just terrifies me! I know that it isn't permanent and if I keep a positive and teachable attitude it will help but yeah.. mean dentists are just scary! So I'm pretty nervous about that.. And also pray for confidence and for me to not be insanely nervous haha! It's going to be here before I know it!
Life has been good lately! Work is really slow for Chris so that has been hard, but God sustains us and has been so good. We are not lacking in anything! :) He is still working towards getting his GRE in Pyschology. He's been studying like crazy! If he does good on this test it would cut down his school time a LOT and that would be a good thing since we are down to about 9 months till he would hopefully be starting academy! So pray for him on October 9th if you think about it!
I'm also preparing for a big test on the 8th. My Missouri Basic Skills test is that day! If I can pass that it opens the door for me to continue my education and have a chance to improve my skills in other areas called expanded functions. Basically that means depending on the classes I choose I can do more than just an average DA. Which would be awesome! Still getting straight A's at school, it's exciting!! Looks good on a resume too.. ;)
So coming up here soon we are going up to KC for a Chiefs vs. Bronco's game with some friends! It's going to be CRAZY cold, but I can't wait! GO Broncos!!
Well, I'm off to the gym!
Love,
Beth
It's FALL!!! Where did summer go?! Totally felt like I wasn't able to truly enjoy summer because of school.. oh well, it was worth it and hopefully next summer I'll be working and able to enjoy it even more! ha! Next year is going to be so different!
Only a month and a half left folks! 5 1/2 months went entirely too fast. Good and bad really. Can't believe it! Things are going really good still, finally feeling like I'm starting to know my stuff a bit more. Still have a looot to learn and it will be hard first starting out in a real office environment! Please be praying for me to be placed in a good office with a dentist that is patient and willing to teach me and doesn't freak out over little things. I keep hearing scary stories of other people in extern getting a scary dentist/office manager and that just terrifies me! I know that it isn't permanent and if I keep a positive and teachable attitude it will help but yeah.. mean dentists are just scary! So I'm pretty nervous about that.. And also pray for confidence and for me to not be insanely nervous haha! It's going to be here before I know it!
Life has been good lately! Work is really slow for Chris so that has been hard, but God sustains us and has been so good. We are not lacking in anything! :) He is still working towards getting his GRE in Pyschology. He's been studying like crazy! If he does good on this test it would cut down his school time a LOT and that would be a good thing since we are down to about 9 months till he would hopefully be starting academy! So pray for him on October 9th if you think about it!
I'm also preparing for a big test on the 8th. My Missouri Basic Skills test is that day! If I can pass that it opens the door for me to continue my education and have a chance to improve my skills in other areas called expanded functions. Basically that means depending on the classes I choose I can do more than just an average DA. Which would be awesome! Still getting straight A's at school, it's exciting!! Looks good on a resume too.. ;)
So coming up here soon we are going up to KC for a Chiefs vs. Bronco's game with some friends! It's going to be CRAZY cold, but I can't wait! GO Broncos!!
Well, I'm off to the gym!
Love,
Beth
Wednesday, August 4, 2010
Almost there!
Almost there!! In more ways than one! Only one more day till Chris is home again, can't wait!! It's been hard having him away... :( I definitely love living with him!! So he'll be home tomorrow night and I'm stoked.. :) I have a great husband!
The other thing that I'm getting really close to, is finishing school!!! I am down to 3 1/2 months! I cannot believe it.. The time is literally flying by and it's so hard to believe that in less than 4 months I'll be working in a dental office! Not sure yet what the plan is for after extern, but I'm really trying to trust God to work something out!! I want Him to show me what He has in store!! I just want it now.. I don't like waiting and not knowing... But, there is nothing I can do about it so the only thing I CAN do is trust Him!! I'm excited and nervous all at the same time! Ready to get out there and get er' done!
Very much looking forward to this weekend! We're going camping with the family Friday night and then Chris and I are going for our date night to the drive in!! Loooove the drive in!! I literally HAVE to go every summer or it's just not summer!
Last weekend was really fun! Went up to the fam's house for the night and got to see everybody! Had family pictures taken and Crystal took some pics of me and Chris as well! I love getting new pics, plus, she takes amazing ones so it's even better!!
Well, just wanted to give a quick update.. :)
Beth
Wednesday, July 28, 2010
Success!
Success is a wonderful word!! I think I like it! My success recently has been finally losing my wedding weight! I'm incredibly stoked to be back down to my small sizes and finally feeling healthy again! It took a lot of work and self control but I am BACK! WOOT! Now to tone, gotta hit the gym and really see what I can do! Still working with the Jillian Michaels workouts, heard they work awesome for women and I'm super excited for more results! Now to stick with it.. hard when you like any and all food haha! There IS such a thing as self control.. hmm... gonna have to remember that.. So worth it tho..
Well, hubby is gone right now.. Off in Arkansas helping a friend out for a few days.. Weird being home alone! Kinda lonely.. I decided I'm not a person who could live all by myself! I like company.. :)
School is going good, can't believe how fast it is going! But the more time I spend in school the more I'm ready to just get out there and get my career started! Sooo nervous about those first couple months... Once you are there and in the field, I feel like you really don't know what you're doing.. But I just want it to be here so I can get the awkwardness out of the way haha!
So Chris has been looking into the schooling he'll need for the State Patrol out here.. Kind of daunting, but I know he can do whatever he puts his mind too.. I'm so nervous of those six months he'll be at the academy.. If the prospect of being alone for the next couple days is sad and lonely, what will it be like to have him gone for 5 out of 7 days a week for 6 months?? I know we'll cross that bridge when we come to it tho. I'm hoping I'll have a job by then to keep me mostly occupied so it doesn't seem so lonely. At least I'll know he's safe, unlike so many wives who's husbands are overseas in the military. I am thankful for that!
Things have been so wonderful lately. I have the most amazing husband and I'm so blessed to have him. He came home with flowers for me the other day, out of the blue, no prompts or anything! Makes me feel so special to know he was thinking of me during his day!
Love him.. :)
On the creative side, got my table runner back after a little while at the quilters... Needless to say.. It's super cute! Albeit a little crooked, but who's looking that close?? Creative I am not haha! I may be a bit of a perfectionist in other areas, but definitely not when it comes to quilting! ;) Thanks to my wonderful mother in law and sis in law for all the help, I would seriously be lost otherwise haha!
Well, I am off! Not sure of my plans for the evening.... Kinda weird not hanging out with Chris! Miss him!!
Hope everyone's week is going fantastic!!
Beth
Well, hubby is gone right now.. Off in Arkansas helping a friend out for a few days.. Weird being home alone! Kinda lonely.. I decided I'm not a person who could live all by myself! I like company.. :)
School is going good, can't believe how fast it is going! But the more time I spend in school the more I'm ready to just get out there and get my career started! Sooo nervous about those first couple months... Once you are there and in the field, I feel like you really don't know what you're doing.. But I just want it to be here so I can get the awkwardness out of the way haha!
So Chris has been looking into the schooling he'll need for the State Patrol out here.. Kind of daunting, but I know he can do whatever he puts his mind too.. I'm so nervous of those six months he'll be at the academy.. If the prospect of being alone for the next couple days is sad and lonely, what will it be like to have him gone for 5 out of 7 days a week for 6 months?? I know we'll cross that bridge when we come to it tho. I'm hoping I'll have a job by then to keep me mostly occupied so it doesn't seem so lonely. At least I'll know he's safe, unlike so many wives who's husbands are overseas in the military. I am thankful for that!
Things have been so wonderful lately. I have the most amazing husband and I'm so blessed to have him. He came home with flowers for me the other day, out of the blue, no prompts or anything! Makes me feel so special to know he was thinking of me during his day!
Love him.. :)
On the creative side, got my table runner back after a little while at the quilters... Needless to say.. It's super cute! Albeit a little crooked, but who's looking that close?? Creative I am not haha! I may be a bit of a perfectionist in other areas, but definitely not when it comes to quilting! ;) Thanks to my wonderful mother in law and sis in law for all the help, I would seriously be lost otherwise haha!
Well, I am off! Not sure of my plans for the evening.... Kinda weird not hanging out with Chris! Miss him!!
Hope everyone's week is going fantastic!!
Beth
Monday, July 5, 2010
Things...
I always seem to let blogging get away from me.. I just forget about it! I need to do better. It's almost like journaling for me! Helps me to go back and remember moments in life!
Things have been different lately. I'm getting worn out. School is going good, and quickly, but I am so tired all the time that it's getting old. School + work for five days a week is getting tiring, but it's what you do! And I can't complain about my job, it really is the ideal thing for me right now! God is good. I just need to push through and look for the good instead of being down about the situation. Thing are never as bad as they seem. Haha! I can't complain, we are in good hands and I live in a great house with my wonderful little family. Chris is really the brightest part of my days, he is so wonderful. We just celebrated our first year together!! He surprised me with a trip to Branson for the weekend at this great little resort where we stayed in a fully stocked condo! It was amazing. I seriously love him more every day. He makes me laugh like no one else!
So things are kind of weird right now. The unknown is so great and weighing on me and I'm trying not to stress out about it. Work is slow for Chris so he has really been looking into the State Patrol more seriously. Things are just so up and down with it, hopes getting up, then down and all over the place that it is just hard not knowing what to do. Be praying we know what the next step is. I do NOT do good with the unkown. I'm terrible with it! I stress and worry and that's never good. I'm trying to just not think about it haha!
Sooooo yeah....
Other than this strange period in our lives things are good! Had a great 4th of July at I love America with a bunch of friends and family!! Chris' leg was feeling good enough for him to play volleyball! Praise God! So glad that stage of his life is pretty much over, that was a hard time to go through! He is definitely excited to move on from that! I am so glad he is almost back to fully functioning, I know it was hard for him.
I'm super excited for the 16th-18th, our first float trip! Can't wait! I've never been and I looove camping so I'm very excited to add canoeing to that. The only thing I'm nervous for: BUGS. BUGS. BUGS. YUCK. lol! I am such a wuss! We have Japanese beatles literally EATING all of our plants right now. Can't get rid of them.. So gross... They are making all our foliage look skeletal. I'm considering bringing my tea rose bush inside to rescue it! I've been watching it closely to make sure they haven't moved on to it yet.. I would be so sad! It's literally the little rose bush that could! Immediately after planting it Bailey decided to dig around in the pot and eat the blooms off of it... SO YEAH.. Somehow it lived!! So I'm ultra protective now haha!
Anyways, I think that's it for tonight.. I gotta go look at my vocab for school tomorrow... *sigh*... lol.. Think positive thoughts! Haha!!
Love,
Beth
Things have been different lately. I'm getting worn out. School is going good, and quickly, but I am so tired all the time that it's getting old. School + work for five days a week is getting tiring, but it's what you do! And I can't complain about my job, it really is the ideal thing for me right now! God is good. I just need to push through and look for the good instead of being down about the situation. Thing are never as bad as they seem. Haha! I can't complain, we are in good hands and I live in a great house with my wonderful little family. Chris is really the brightest part of my days, he is so wonderful. We just celebrated our first year together!! He surprised me with a trip to Branson for the weekend at this great little resort where we stayed in a fully stocked condo! It was amazing. I seriously love him more every day. He makes me laugh like no one else!
So things are kind of weird right now. The unknown is so great and weighing on me and I'm trying not to stress out about it. Work is slow for Chris so he has really been looking into the State Patrol more seriously. Things are just so up and down with it, hopes getting up, then down and all over the place that it is just hard not knowing what to do. Be praying we know what the next step is. I do NOT do good with the unkown. I'm terrible with it! I stress and worry and that's never good. I'm trying to just not think about it haha!
Sooooo yeah....
Other than this strange period in our lives things are good! Had a great 4th of July at I love America with a bunch of friends and family!! Chris' leg was feeling good enough for him to play volleyball! Praise God! So glad that stage of his life is pretty much over, that was a hard time to go through! He is definitely excited to move on from that! I am so glad he is almost back to fully functioning, I know it was hard for him.
I'm super excited for the 16th-18th, our first float trip! Can't wait! I've never been and I looove camping so I'm very excited to add canoeing to that. The only thing I'm nervous for: BUGS. BUGS. BUGS. YUCK. lol! I am such a wuss! We have Japanese beatles literally EATING all of our plants right now. Can't get rid of them.. So gross... They are making all our foliage look skeletal. I'm considering bringing my tea rose bush inside to rescue it! I've been watching it closely to make sure they haven't moved on to it yet.. I would be so sad! It's literally the little rose bush that could! Immediately after planting it Bailey decided to dig around in the pot and eat the blooms off of it... SO YEAH.. Somehow it lived!! So I'm ultra protective now haha!
Anyways, I think that's it for tonight.. I gotta go look at my vocab for school tomorrow... *sigh*... lol.. Think positive thoughts! Haha!!
Love,
Beth
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